I did it again. I let my faulty ‘auto-pilot’ kick in when an unexpected problem came up recently. I had to give myself a good talking to for sure! Good news though – I am learning to lean on my Father more and more. And though I may panic for a bit I continue to remind myself to stop and pray.
This year has been financially tougher than I’ve seen in several years. And I will be honest, as a result I’ve been a bit more emotional about it – I think a lot of it has to do with my Fibromyalgia giving me troubles so much. When one is in constant/chronic pain, you tend to find yourself weepy and depressed if you aren’t careful.
I try not to allow myself to ‘go there’ if you know what I mean. But sometimes when I’ve been working through the pain and staying strong for so long – if one more thing comes along, I lose it. I guess that is what happened this week.
As mentioned in previous posts I’ve had several learning experiences concerning my finances of late. To give a bit of history, I was not taught about money-handling, so I will be the first to tell you that looking back – I made bad choices throughout my life. The frustrating thing is that I get all straightened up and doing well financially and then get stupid. I allow the influence of others get to me and end up allowing them to blow through all of my money and even ruin my credit. Not their fault – it is mine.
But through this I am learning to lean on God. And I do. And He comes through. Every. Single. Time!
So this week, my phone crashed and burned – permanently. It is our only means of communication because I, like many others these days, did away with the landline (in order to save money). So I was freaking out about what I was going to do – I have a near-8-year old child – I need to be available for school calls, etc.
Once I calmed down – I decided to see if I could get one of my old dinosaur phones to work. I did and was back in operation within a very long and agonizing day. Whew!!
Two days later I come home to find that the furnace is no longer working at my home! So we borrowed an electric space heater and I turned the electric oven on for a bit – and we bundled up to keep warm. I lay in bed for hours not being able to sleep worrying about what in the world I was going to do. You see – we live literally paycheck to paycheck with a negative balance of about $300 in my bank account. I don’t have credit cards and no savings.
By morning I was a mess. But I kept reminding myself that God was in control and He has never let me down. I even felt guilty for having all of those negative, dooming ideas. I continued to pray and talk with God all the way to work.
When I got to work I asked someone for advice on what he thought the problem was and who I should contact for repairs. He gave me the info. I made the call – told them my situation. The man quoted me a price range of $200 – $500 (based on my description of the issue). So I requested that they just come out to do a diagnosis only. Once he came up with a solid figure – then I would determine what I was going to do.
You see, in addition to all of this financial mess I’m in – because I haven’t felt so great physically this year – I hadn’t even started buying Christmas gifts yet! So I was in a real pickle. To top it off – I felt I needed to do something special for my son this year (long story – will fill you in later).
In the meantime, I set about hitting the old ex-husband up for some of that child support that he was behind on and I needed. Though I didn’t get all that I asked for – he did come up with $200 for me. Then I went to my employer to request an advance on my paycheck that comes after Christmas – and they agreed. All along I was singing praises to God!
This morning my dad met the repair guy at the house. I left a blank check and told my dad that if the repairs were $300 or less to go ahead and pay it – and if it was more, to call me first. As it turned out – the total bill was $169.00!!!!!!!!!
Needless to say, I’ve been grinning ear-to-ear and thanking God over and over. I’ve also apologized for being a goober and lacking faith….again! Saying that you have faith and then worrying about things contradicts itself. I know that. And I don’t know why I keep stumbling….but I am working on it.
I’m so blessed – and so thankful. And I am His child!
Okay – this is totally changing gears here….but I want to get it down before I forget.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about our world lately and the technology that we have. Where a lot of folks my age may grumble about what our world is coming to – I find that I am fascinated and inspired with the advances. I’m not going to get into all of the details – but wanted to mention a few that touch the lives of many. Just to let you younger folks realize how quickly things are progressing now:
Keeping mind that I am now 49 years old…..
My mother’s family was one of the first in their town to have a color television!
I have used the following for music: vinyl records, 8-track tapes, cassette tapes, Walkman, CDs, I-Pods
When I was a junior in high school I took computer programming classes – which was practically unheard of at that time. They had just started having home computers – but were not the norm for everyone. We used DOS. We bought a Radio-Shack TRS-80 computer. And we had a blast!
I remember when they first started having paperback books in the library! THAT was a treat! BTW – I now have a Kindle, thank you very much! And yes, I love it!
I seldom handwrite anything anymore….and that’s okay by me – I love email and Facebook and Twitter and Instagram and texting and more!
My 76 year old dad texts – awesome!!!
My mother was in her 60’s and was emailing and surfing the ‘net – how cool is that!? BTW – my dad operates an online business – Woohoo!
And I won’t even start with the automobiles – but let me tell you we didn’t have electric windows or locks when I first started driving.
Alright – enough of that – but I have to say I embrace all of enthusiasm that the younger folks have for advancing and seeking new things! I may be a bit slower….but I love it too!
Have a wonderful day and thanks for stopping by – come again!