Call Me the Clay

I did it again.  I let my faulty ‘auto-pilot’ kick in when an unexpected problem came up recently.  I had to give myself a good talking to for sure!  Good news though – I am learning to lean on my Father more and more.  And though I may panic for a bit I continue to remind myself to stop and pray.

This year has been financially tougher than I’ve seen in several years.  And I will be honest, as a result I’ve been a bit more emotional about it – I think a lot of it has to do with my Fibromyalgia giving me troubles so much.  When one is in constant/chronic pain, you tend to find yourself weepy and depressed if you aren’t careful. 

I try not to allow myself to ‘go there’ if you know what I mean.  But sometimes when I’ve been working through the pain and staying strong for so long – if one more thing comes along, I lose it.   I guess that is what happened this week.

As mentioned in previous posts I’ve had several learning experiences concerning my finances of late.  To give a bit of history, I was not taught about money-handling, so I will be the first to tell you that looking back – I made bad choices throughout my life.  The frustrating thing is that I get all straightened up and doing well financially and then get stupid.  I allow the influence of others get to me and end up allowing them to blow through all of my money and even ruin my credit.  Not their fault – it is mine.

But through this I am learning to lean on God.  And I do.  And He comes through.  Every. Single. Time!

So this week, my phone crashed and burned – permanently.  It is our only means of communication because I, like many others these days, did away with the landline (in order to save money).  So I was freaking out about what I was going to do – I have a near-8-year old child – I need to be available for school calls, etc.

Once I calmed down – I decided to see if I could get one of my old dinosaur phones to work.  I did and was back in operation within a very long and agonizing day. Whew!!

Two days later I come home to find that the furnace is no longer working at my home!  So we borrowed an electric space heater and I turned the electric oven on for a bit – and we bundled up to keep warm.  I lay in bed for hours not being able to sleep worrying about what in the world I was going to do.  You see – we live literally paycheck to paycheck with a negative balance of about $300 in my bank account.  I don’t have credit cards and no savings. 

By morning I was a mess.  But I kept reminding myself that God was in control and He has never let me down.  I even felt guilty for having all of those negative, dooming ideas.  I continued to pray and talk with God all the way to work.

When I got to work I asked someone for advice on what he thought the problem was and who I should contact for repairs.  He gave me the info.  I made the call – told them my situation.  The man quoted me a price range of $200 – $500 (based on my description of the issue).  So I requested that they just come out to do a diagnosis only.  Once he came up with a solid figure – then I would determine what I was going to do.

You see, in addition to all of this financial mess I’m in – because I haven’t felt so great physically this year – I hadn’t even started buying Christmas gifts yet!  So I was in a real pickle.  To top it off – I felt I needed to do something special for my son this year (long story – will fill you in later).

In the meantime, I set about hitting the old ex-husband up for some of that child support that he was behind on and I needed.  Though I didn’t get all that I asked for – he did come up with $200 for me.  Then I went to my employer to request an advance on my paycheck that comes after Christmas – and they agreed.  All along I was singing praises to God!

This morning my dad met the repair guy at the house.  I left a blank check and told my dad that if the repairs were $300 or less to go ahead and pay it – and if it was more, to call me first.  As it turned out – the total bill was $169.00!!!!!!!!!

Needless to say, I’ve been grinning ear-to-ear and thanking God over and over.  I’ve also apologized for being a goober and lacking faith….again!  Saying that you have faith and then worrying about things contradicts itself.  I know that.  And I don’t know why I keep stumbling….but I am working on it.

I’m so blessed – and so thankful.  And I am His child!

 

 

Okay – this is totally changing gears here….but I want to get it down before I forget.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about our world lately and the technology that we have.  Where a lot of folks my age may grumble about what our world is coming to – I find that I am fascinated and inspired with the advances.  I’m not going to get into all of the details – but wanted to mention a few that touch the lives of many.  Just to let you younger folks realize how quickly things are progressing now:

Keeping mind that I am now 49 years old…..

My mother’s family was one of the first in their town to have a color television!

I have used the following for music:  vinyl records, 8-track tapes, cassette tapes, Walkman, CDs, I-Pods

When I was a junior in high school I took computer programming classes – which was practically unheard of at that time.  They had just started having home computers – but were not the norm for everyone.  We used DOS.  We bought a Radio-Shack TRS-80 computer.  And we had a blast!

I remember when they first started having paperback books in the library!  THAT was a treat!  BTW – I now have a Kindle, thank you very much!  And yes, I love it!

I seldom handwrite anything anymore….and that’s okay by me – I love email and Facebook and Twitter and Instagram and texting and more!

My 76 year old dad texts – awesome!!!

My mother was in her 60’s and was emailing and surfing the ‘net – how cool is that!?  BTW – my dad operates an online business – Woohoo!

And I won’t even start with the automobiles – but let me tell you we didn’t have electric windows or locks when I first started driving.

Alright – enough of that – but I have to say I embrace all of enthusiasm that the younger folks have for advancing and seeking new things!  I may be a bit slower….but I love it too!

Have a wonderful day and thanks for stopping by – come again!